SLAP!

Wow, was that cathartic.

Midway through the fourth quarter I talked to my sister and brother-in-law briefly, and I said something about how the Rams were terrible and it was fitting the Lions destroyed them. He countered with how they first in the NFC West. Well....the NFC West is like two blind guys in a butt-touching contest: who really wins in an inept competition of the handicapped? The NFC West is BRUTAL, and the post I made the other day dealing with the Rams as a sham team due to their schedule looks even better now.

I don't want to take ANYTHING away from this victory (which I'll be examining later), but it's just nice to see the Lions denominate a team they had every right to beat.

IN YOUR FACE, BRADFORD!

Rams look v.1.0

So, the Detroit columnists are beginning to hypothesize about the impending matchup this weekend with the St. Louis Rams. Drew Sharp touches upon it in his own impish, antagonistic way (I can only imagine how absolutely dire he'll make it seem by this weekend), and Carlos Monarrez gives a brief description of how the Rams are rolling this year.

Granted, I do think this is a must-win game, if that phrase can even exist this early in a season, but if the Lions do lose, it will be close and probably due to some cruddy officiating. I just don't think the Rams are capable this time around. Let's break their schedule thus far down:

1	Sun, Sep 12	vs Arizona	L 17-13
2	Sun, Sep 19	@ Oakland	L 16-14
3	Sun, Sep 26	vs Washington	W 30-16
4	Sun, Oct 3	vs Seattle	W 20-3

This doesn't seem like the hardest schedule when you actually look at it, eh? Losses against a Cardinals team that is absolutely atrocious and a Raiders team that is, well, pretty bad as well. They beat Washington at home (Washington is pretty inept, honestly) and Seattle at home (Look at the Seahawks roster. Is it even better than a collegiate team? Really?). Steven Jackson is pretty beaten up, so running into the Lions healthy front seven could knock him around. The defensive line has been pretty dern good against Jay Cutler, Brett Favre, and Aaron Rodgers. They did an okay job against Mike Vick, but really, how do most "good" teams do against him? Bradford is, lest we all forget, a rookie. If the Lions keep constant pressure on him, give him little to no time to make decisions, then I don't see why they can't force him into turnovers.

Get ahead, attack the QB when they need to air it out, and just keep grinding with Best and Smith, and I don't see why this can't be the first decisive victory of the season.

potential success?

I know this is going to sound like sunshine shot right out of a rectum, but consider the Lions schedule for the durations of the season:

Oct 10	St. Louis	1:00pm
Oct 17	@N.Y. Giants	1:00pm
Week 7	BYE
Oct 31	Washington	1:00pm
Nov 7	N.Y. Jets	1:00pm
Nov 14	@Buffalo	1:00pm
Nov 21	@Dallas	1:00pm
Nov 25	New England	12:30pm
Dec 5	Chicago	1:00pm
Dec 12	Green Bay	1:00pm
Dec 19	@Tampa Bay	1:00pm
Dec 26	@Miami	1:00pm
Jan 2	Minnesota	1:00pm

So.

Let's look at this logically (and by "logically" I mean "with the rosiest spectacles money can acquire!"): the Lions have been playing shorthanded pretty much all season, injury-wise. Nobody seems to be able to stay/get/maintain being healthy. Now, let's also assume the injured people start coming back, coupled with the strides the people who are playing have made. Suddenly, the team looks a heckuva lot better. Next week, para example:

Rams. The stank Rams that won all of 1 game last year. The stank Rams that have a hobbled Steven Jackson and a cast of characters that aren't really better than the teams the Lions have played thus far. Optimistically, let's say the Lions get Nate Burleson and DeAndre Levy back. The LB's then have Follett, Peterson, and Levy AKA the Lineup That isn't Terrible (Nothing against Landon Johnson or Other Guy who filled in.....uh....admirably?.......but, having the natural MLB back is, well, a terrific upgrade). Calvin Johnson has a guy on the other side of the field who is, most decidedly, a trillion times better than Bryant Johnson. In addition to the magical due of Scheffler and Pettigrew (you can only imagine how hard that guy's gonna work this week on NOT dropping passes. Oy). In addition to another week's health improvement to Jahvid Best. In addition to Kevin Smith getting back into game shape. Suddenly, the offense isn't looking so bleak.

In fact, it looks, well, good. Better than it has been in weeks, really.

Will they lose this game? I don't think so.

And now, after using logic, let me break down how things can go the rest of the season, barring horrible injuries and Stafford coming back.

Week 5 - Rams - a win at home, or Ndamukong Suh will destroy a federal building with his bare hands (or will they be BEAR hands?! ....'cause he's a beast. Whatever). (1-4)

Week 6 - @ NY Giants - with they way they've been playing, in all honesty, this could be a win as well. Eli Manning is flipping out. They can't seem to run. I think Stafford comes back this week. If the Lions can stretch the field and even utilize this screen-and-underneath passing they worked so well today, they can get ahead. (2-4)

Week 7 - Bye - pfft. Piece of cake.

Week 8 - Washington - I feel like the Redskins have been playing over their heads, and they haven't even really been playing that well. Also, injuries: healed. I see "win." (3-4)

Week 9 - NY Jets - Ugh. Sorry Kong, but this is a home win that seems a bit out of reach. Loss, in a closer matchup than people think (AKA Stafford outplays Sanchez, but loses the game because the Jets D is SNAWESOME). (3-5)

Week 10 - @ Buffalo - Thank the Good Lord they have been playing about as crappily as a team can. If (IIIIIIIFFFFFFFF) the Lions lose to the Giants, this should be their first road win of the year. (4-5)

Week 11 - @ Dallas - This just doesn't seem like a game the Cowboys will lose. They have too much on the line...and yet, that could be all Detroit needs. The Lions will be playing like a team with nothing to lose, and Romo can't seem to deal with pressure....but still. They will pass all over Detroit's secondary. (4-6)

Week 12 - New England - I want to pick the Lions for this game. I NEED to pick the Lions for this game. I just....can't. Don't get me wrong: this game is completely winnable for Detroit. It's just that I don't think their luck will hold out on this one. Still, it really could be a win. (4-7)

Week 13 - Chicago - I think the Lions have this game circled on their calendars. They are going to try and decapitate Jay Cutler, and I think the offensive line, for the first time all season, will try and cripple an opposing defensive line. It will be a good, heart-healthy win. (5-7)

Week 14 - Green Bay - This game has me vexed. I mean, after today's performance, they should be able to win this game. But the thing is, I don't think the Packers have matured quite yet this year; they are going to get better. They are too talented not to. I think this is another loss, but perhaps a closer one than I think. (5-8)

Week 15 - @ Tampa Bay - I think this could be a win. The Bucs...they're also playing over their heads. They remind me a lot of the Lions last year, how they had some people....but a lot of open space. I think this will be a win. (6-8)

Week 16 - @ Miami - This is the game I believe in with no real explanation. I just feel like the Lions will win this game. Call it a Christmas miracle. (7-8)

Week 17 - Minnesota - Blech. As much as I'm loathe to admit it, I think the Vikings will be doing a whole lot better by the end of the season. I just dry heaved a little, but I think this will be a loss, but it will be a loss that sets the table for a NASTY rivalry next year. (7-9)

I don't know. I honestly believe that record is within grasp, but again, that's barring horrific injuries and what not.

/pooped a bit